New Positive Outlook

Hello all,

I've been meaning to get back over here and update after that last downer post.

Actually, I've been putting off posting because I wanted to add some pictures, but I don't know how to get the pictures off of my iphone and onto my MacBook. I forgot to ask my son to help me this past weekend. No matter, I felt like writing and updating today. Nothing specific, just random thoughts and what's new with me.

Last post I was in the midst of feeling extremely down and depressed. And actually posting about it made me feel somewhat better. I was however proactive and doing all that I could to feel my best and find a solution. I even scheduled some time to speak with a professional who told me that there are many triggers contributing to my feeling depressed (shorter winter days, holidays, obligation, overworking, missing my children, extended family stuff, loneliness etc. etc.) and that I was doing all of the proper things I needed to do to for my health, but the piece that was causing the most distress was my over thinking, over active mind. Just knowing that allowed me the opportunity to change my thinking when a sad or negative thought popped in, and  I also started supplementing myself with additional vitamin D and ya know what? I feel so much better, like my true self again! So, yay to me for making a quick turnaround. My only wish for the future is that I am able to recognize when this is happening to me again before I get too immersed into depression. Depression flat out SUCKS and if you've ever suffered then you understand. I am not going to be ashamed of being depressed ever again, but rather speak out and hopefully make a difference in the lives of others as well as my own. 

I should also say that I have some really great friends that reached out and took me to breakfast, went on walks with me, shared deep conversation and just were there for me...so if you are one of those great people, thank you so much. It really means the world to me and makes a true difference.

Now that I have climbed out from feeling depressed and back to me again, things are going very well. I weigh in each week at my TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) meeting and this week I was down -4.6lbs, so very pleased with that. I have been truly faithful about tracking honestly and being extremely careful about staying within my calorie limit. I always drink the required water and strive to get enough sleep every night. Of course I try to get enough exercise, but find it more difficult in the winter when the daylight hours are shorter. So my new fix for that is with my sweet and supportive husband's assistance, I am creating a workout room that includes a treadmill, stepper, free weights and all the yoga essentials. All of these simple and healthy lifestyle adjustments are what have led to my current weight loss and new positive outlook.

Ya know, it really is that simple. It seems that I have always made it more difficult to lose weight than it needs to be. I cannot explain it but I feel different this time around, it's almost like an empowerment of sorts. There is something in me that just knows I am going to attain my goal. Having this week off work and allowing myself some time to breathe without over planning and over extending myself every day has been a real eye opener in that I have been reevaluating many things that lead to my healthy lifestyle. 

My goal is to make healthy decisions in my food and exercise choices, but what about livelihood? Has my job been contributing to my difficulty in losing weight as well as feeling depressed? Is my job contributing to me feeling ill so much? Can I keep going at this pace? 

The past few days since I have been feeling ill yet again have left me home with nothing to do but think (possibly overthink) about where I am at in life, where I want to be and what I need to do about it.

I've been very careful about my food choices and staying within my calorie limits. I am exercising faithfully and am creating a work out room now that my children are grown and out of the house. But I am seriously considering looking to work at another school campus, or possibly making a career change. I actually applied for three different positions today.

I read somewhere that if you work at a job that you love, it will not feel like work at all... hmmm.... I think I am overworking and not allowing enough time for me to be the best me anymore. 

All of this has really got me to thinking....YES, I am going to leave my current place of employment at years end. I don't even know if I want to stay in the same district any longer. And ya know, I have a calm, confident and peaceful feeling about it. I actually feel good about making this decision. I'm not sure where I am going to work but I'm ok with that.

If I have difficulty finding another teaching position, maybe I will just work at Nordstrom for a while.

I am lucky to have a strong and supportive husband that backs me up no matter what. Thank goodness for that! 

Well, that's what has been consuming my mind of late. For now though I am off to get my hair cut and colored, as close to the lighter natural color as possible (by Sarah's hair girl). I'm kind of excited about it. New hair is always a terrific boost! Hopefully it will look beautiful and contribute to the new healthy and happy me.

Until next time-

Keep shining :)

Lisa